In Americanah, we get a long look at both Ifemelu’s romantic relationships and how she perceives the relationships of those around her. There are recurring instances where Ifemulu witnesses and criticizes toxic relationships, such as in one of her blog posts about “Women in Lagos who define their lives by men they can never truly have, crippled by their culture of dependence” (Adichie, p.521). Yet in America, she can’t seem to find a relationship she can be fully fulfilled in either. By the end of the book, we see Ifemelu reconnect with her only genuine romantic love, Obinze.
Ifemelu often faults the relationships she sees around her. On page 198, Ifemelu pities Kimberly and her relationship with Don, imagining he is probably cheating. However, when Ifemelu discovered Curt’s potential infidelity, she accepted it, claiming “Sparkling Paula was one more small adventure of his” (Adichie, p. 261). On page 184, “It saddened her [Ifemelu] that Aunty Uju had settled merely for what was familiar.” (Adichie) Later, Ifemelu feels like she doesn’t belong in Blaine’s social circle and their philosophies (Adichie, p. 399). I think feeling stable but not fulfilled is something Ifemelu has gotten used to in her relationships with Curt and Blaine.
Ifemelu’s romantic relationships start and end with Obinze. We never see her feel the same way for others as Obinze, like how she describes her love on page 583. Her relationship with Obinze is the only relationship where she feels completely comfortable. Not only can she finally open up to him about her encounter with the tennis coach, but he also understands her in a way no one else has. She tells Obinze, “I always saw the ceiling with other men“ (Adichie, p. 563). Likewise, Obinze wondered if she knew “how each day was infected by her, affected by her” (Adichie, p. 563). With Obinze, Ifemelu was finally valued for who she was and not expected to change into who her partner wanted her to be. I think it is interesting that during this time, she was also her most independent. She made her own decision to move back to Nigeria, and after quitting her initial job she began another blog. Although she, of course, wants Obinze, she doesn’t need to rely on him in the way we see many of the women rely on their partners in the book. I think Ifemelu finds the kind of love she has desired since the beginning of the book.
Adichie, Chimamanda Ngozi. (2014). Americanah. New York: Anchor Books, a division of Random House LLC.
It is interesting how Ifemelu looked at other relationships and drew conclusions about whether or not it was a good relationship or not considering she herself was having multiple issues in her own personal relationships. I agree with certain points Ifemelu makes about other relationships being toxic and unfair such as Aunt Uju and the Chief's relationship, the power dynamic is unreasonable in their relationship. Aunt Uju has no power whatsoever; whatever she needs or wants something she has to get it through the Chief first and since nothing was officially hers it made Aunt Uju a sitting duck when the Chief died. In the end, Aunt Uju had no choice but to flee when the chief family came to claim all his belongings because of her role of only being a mistress. I do however want to question Ifemelu's rights to criticize others' relationships when she herself was flirting back and forth with Obinze via email while being in a relationship with other men back in America not to mention still willingly seeing Obinze when she returned to Nigeria knowing well he was still married. Ifemelu characteristics to me imply she and Obinze as people who hold high morals and ethics yet they still manage to go through with an affair. I did not expect them to end up together the way they did at the very end.
ReplyDeleteThe inclusion of Ifemelu's feelings about relationships outside of her own makes the a much more complicated topic. As mentioned, Ifemelu again and again will accept the shortcomings in her own relationship while criticizing the relationships of others. This leads to questions about what this does for Ifemelu as a character.
ReplyDeleteIt could be the case that this criticizations of others' relationships is in fact showing the youthful ignorance of Ifemelu during the beginnings of the novel, or possibly her true feelings versus those that she thinks one should have.
Ifemelu accepting Curt's cheating brings to light her lack of care not only for the act of cheating, which she initially seems to not find acceptable due to her dislike for Aunty Uju's relationship, but also her lack of care for the relationship itself. This is seen further when she cheats on Curt with the man from her apartment simply because "she was curious" (Adiche 355). This lack of care towards cheating disappears when she gets back together with Obinze in which she is constantly avoiding the idea of him having a family and calls him a "Fucking coward" for not divorcing his wife and leaving his child to be with her (Adiche 557).
This change in behaviors adds a lot to this concept of Ifemelu's view on love and relationships.
Adiche, Chimamanda Ngozi. "Americanah." Vintage Books, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. 2014